The other day, Mary and I were at our neighborhood playground when she said,

“I’m not afraid of going high up anymore… because I’m a gymnast!”
“You’re a gymnast?”
“Yes, and we go on high beams so I am not afraid of going high up anymore.”
“So, you’re a gymnast.  Are you also a ballet dancer?”
“No, I do not want to be a ballet dancer… I do not like ballet anymore… I like boys now, too!”
“What? What did you say?”
“I like boys, you know, guys?”
“What do you mean you like boys? You mean, you like doing stuff that they do?”

I just don’t know how the conversation went from not wanting to be a ballet dancer to liking boys???!!!
So, I persisted.  I wanted to know exactly what she meant.  After all, she is only five years old.
Finally, she said, “I like boys, you know, I have a crush on them.”
“You have a crush? Who?”
“I have a crush on James, actually he has a crush on me.”
“Do you even know what “crush” means?”
“I don’t know.  Jackson told me. He told me that James has a crush on me.  Do you know what it means?”
“Having a crush means you like somebody.”
“I have a crush on 2 boys.  I like Isaac, too.”
“What do you like about Isaac?”
“You would think it is funny.  I think, he looks cool.”

And I had to let go of a hearty laugh right then.  I was laughing because it was funny that my five-year-old finds someone cool.  I was laughing because I can’t believe that she already has standards of attraction and that she knows what appeals to her.  I am laughing because I felt like crying inside— my baby is no longer a baby.